Are You Too Much of a Dumba*s to Get Anything Out of This Post?

I was in the book store the other day and wandered by the self-help section and this is a partial list of the actual titles I saw:

  • The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life

  • You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life

  • Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life

  • How to Stop Feeling Like Sh*t: 14 Habits That Are Holding You Back from Happiness

  • Not Another F-ing Motivation Book: A Pragmatist's Guide to Nailing Your Motivation, Keeping It, and Effortlessly Achieving Your Goals

  • How to Make Sh*t Happen: Make more money, get in better shape, create epic relationships and control your life!

  • How to be F*ucking Awesome: Sticking a Finger Up to the Law of Attraction and Thumb Up to Action

This straight-talk-approach-with-a-cursey-title is an interesting fad. But perhaps it’s more than a fad. Maybe the world’s best psychologists, therapists and self-help gurus have been missing something all these years, and this is a breakthrough.

In which case, they need to go back and make some adjustments to their previously published books. Here are some suggestions (in bold):

  • The Purpose-Driven Life (God Wants You to Get Your Sh*t Together)

  • The Last Lecture Because Soon I’m Gonna be Dead B*tches

  • The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, of Which You Are NOT One, Sh*thead

  • The Muthaf*ckin Prophet, Muthaf*cka!

  • Piece of Cr*p to Great

  • The Art of Happiness by The Dalai Lama Himself

  • You Can Stick The Road Less Traveled Up Your ***

  • How to Win Friends and Influence People and Dump Losers and Stop Being Such a Pain in the A*s

  • Awaken the Giant Within Your Worthless A*s

  • First Things First: You’re an A*shole

  • When Bad Things Happen to Good People They Probably Deserved It Just Like You Do, F*ckwad

  • I’m OK – But You’re a Dumb*ss

  • The Alchemist: A Novel About Turning Sh*t (like you) into Something Valuable (not currently you)

  • Rich Dad, Drunk Dad; Nice Mom, Sl*tty Mom

  • Think for Once You G*dd*mned Imbecile and Grow Rich

  • The Power of Intention is About All You Got Going On, You Sh*tbag

  • As a Dumba*s Thinketh

  • Change Man's  Search for Meaning  to Your Pointless, Futile Search for a Clue

  • The Power of Positively Putting Curse Words in Your F*cking Book F*cking Title F*ckers


And, of course:

  • Build Your Hovel in the Air: Thoreau's Inspiring Advice for Your Unlikely Success in Business (and Life) in the 21st Century Which is Already 19 Years Old and You’re Still a Dipsh*t

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